What Is A Highly Sensitive Person aka A Feeler

What’s a feeler you ask. Well, a feeler is a person who may be referred to as ‘sensitive” or “emotional”. If this describes you or someone you know, this is my attempt to use words to explain the physical process a feeler may experience in what most would consider average situations and it would serve you well to try to understand them.

Sensitive people are often looked down on because they are sometimes viewed as high maintenance or overly emotional. In reality, they are precious beings who have depths to their souls that others will never experience. Feelers are the ones who processes every noise, every voice, every word spoken in every room that they are in. Silence and words left unsaid can be crushing.

There are many adjectives used to describe the person who may be “a little extra”. I know because I am one. It has taken me a long time and a lot of tears to not only learn and understand but also embrace this part of myself. Now I’m learning to celebrate the fact that I feel and think a little deeper than most, it’s a gift in fact….it’s my superpower.

There are times when it feels as though every nerve in my body lives just under my skin, with a direct link to my soul, and that is what makes me feel everything. When I say everything, I truly mean EVERYTHING. I can be sensitive to the varying degrees of brightness in lights and colors of lights. Every light and every sound can either be soothing, breathtaking, or harsh and abrasive.

People who are sensitive are often people pleasers because they know what hurt and disappointment feel like. We are worried about hurting someone else. Words are swords and unlike the children’s chant sticks and stones, words will hurt and may even break us. On the other side, words of affirmation, affection, encouragement and appreciation fills my heart.

The smallest things mean the most. I am very in tune to my surroundings, noticing the smallest change in the energy in the room, the look someone gives across the table, or even the tone of a conversation. Giving small gifts, a sincere smile to a stranger, holding a door, help someone in the grocery store, handwritten notes, or even just a quick text fills me with so much joy.

I get attached quickly and have a very difficult time letting go. I often try to tell people how I feel about them because I need them to know. Unfortunately, not many truly understand the depth my love runs. I can honestly say sometimes I love so deeply it hurts and all of this feeling and thinking is absolutely physically exhausting.

To close out this post I’d like to share some of my favorite quotes and as always, I would love to hear from you. What do you think of this post? How did it make you feel? Are you a sensitive person that can feel these words?

“They hear nearly every sound, notice every movement, and process the expression on every person’s face. And that means that simply walking through a public space can be an assault on their senses.”

— Andre Sólo, Everything You Need to Know About Highly Sensitive People

“I am very sensitive to the interactions I have with people. Whether it’s a momentary glance in an elevator, or a deep philosophical conversation over dinner, or a brush-by in a café, I feel (sometimes exhaustingly) attuned and affected by the subtle exchanges that pass seemingly benignly between us as human ships. Being a sensitive empath is a beautiful thing as an artist, and it fosters a deep burning curiosity about why we do the things we do.”

― Alanis Morissette

“The truly creative mind in any field is no more than this: A human creature born abnormally, inhumanly sensitive. To them… a touch is a blow, a sound is a noise, a misfortune is a tragedy, a joy is an ecstasy, a friend is a lover, a lover is a god, and failure is death. Add to this cruelly delicate organism the overpowering necessity to create, create, create — so that without the creating of music or poetry or books or buildings or something of meaning, their very breath is cut off… They must create, must pour out creation. By some strange, unknown, inward urgency they are not really alive unless they are creating.”

― Pearl Buck, The Good Earth

“They see the transparency behind walls people put up. They stand on the battlefield of life and expose their heart’s transparency, so others can finish the day with hope. They are the sensitive souls that understand that before they could be a light they first had to feel the burn.”

― Shannon L. Alder

 “By noticing and processing so many details around them — not to mention their own internal thoughts — highly sensitive people are doing far more cognitive work than most others. Being overstimulated and frazzled is something anyone can identify with, but for HSPs, it happens much more easily.”

— Andre Sólo

“One of my favorite aspects of high sensitivity is finding wonder in the smallest of things.”

— Cati Vanden Breul, 8 Reasons Being Highly Sensitive Is Actually a Good Thing